WTF Am I Doing Here?

This is bibimbap.  It is delicious and I make embarassingly audible happy noises when I try to eat it.  It was also the target of my first solo restaurant trip last night.  

Aside from some confusion regarding the proper translation of the word “hot” (bibimbap may be served in a hot or cold bowl) the trip was a success.  I enjoyed the food almost as much as I enjoyed the waitresses peeking around corners to try to stare at me without being obvious about it.  They don’t get many foreigners around here.

These are my 6 side dishes and soup, which would probably be enough food for me even without the main course.  Without the help of my Korean friends I got to play my favorite food game: “Guess which items are most likely to be edible!” This is an important game.  If you don’t play carefully enough you might wind up doing something like mistaking anchovies for seaweed.  That once made for a memorable breakfast.  After selecting a likely dish I got to move immediately to my second favorite food game: “Guess how this food is properly eaten.”

Pro tip for the etiquette conscious: the answer is almost never “pick it up and eat it with your hands.”  

It’s considered bad form to touch food, even food that isn’t being shared.  I’ve been on the receiving end of funny stares for picking up things like carrot sticks, pizza, potato chips, watermelon slices, and entire drumsticks of fried chicken. Take a moment to consider picking up a carrot stick with chopsticks.  Not easy.